i'm lost and i look like a hooker
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
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