I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
Randomize
