just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
Woke up to a bottle of gatorade and a packet of saltine crackers tied to underwear hanging from my ceiling fan, along with 3 advil stuck to a piece of duct tape and a note saying "have a happy hangover- <3 you/me"
Drunk you is pretty stunner.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
