I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
You made out with two different species that night
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
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