did I really admit that id have sex with that cougar had I been more drunk?...ugh...i need to masterbate more
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
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