nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
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