yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
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