have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
this morning i woke up under the kitchen table. i went to my room and there was an inflatable whale in my bed with a banana duct taped to where its penis should be. there were trails of cheez-its around my apartment and i found $67 in the crotch of my underwear. im guessing i had a very happy birthday.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
You stole my car to go to your boyfriends. Now your parents are fucking in the next room at top volume, and I have no way to escape..thought you should know that the amount of therapy I'll be needing for this is expensive.
You're the best friend ever.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
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