Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
Randomize
