I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
Randomize
