I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
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