She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Randomize
