You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
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