i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize