Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
Help me. My dealer just asked me to have a child with him. Sat me down for a heart to heart "he's almost 40 and losing his shit cause he's single and wants babies" talk. How the fuck am I supposed to feel about this????
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
Randomize
