Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
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