we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
Randomize
