I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
Reggie can tackle my bush.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
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