question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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