So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
Randomize