Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
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