South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
turns out the guy i was dating because he was a cop was not actually a cop. i learned this as he got arrested by real cops.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
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