OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
Say something about gay babies.
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
Randomize
