my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
Randomize
