The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
She's not a foreskin expert like you
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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