I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
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don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
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