good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
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Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
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Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
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