Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
