redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize
