Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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