This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
Randomize
