I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
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