Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
