she woke up with a sticky ear
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
Randomize
