piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
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