Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
I think I am morally bankrupt
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize
