they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
I need moral support for this bender
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
if I start to respond to these political texts with a middle finger emoji - do you think they will get the hint?
Randomize
