He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
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