Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
Also, there's definitely not a non-hilarious way to ask to stick something up your butt.
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
Randomize
