hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
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