I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
Randomize
