So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
Randomize
