A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
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