I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
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