I think scott just propositioned me for sex
my phone is set on vibrate and its tucked up in my left front pocket. call me back 20 times real quick.
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
Randomize