i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
you traded sex for a burrito?
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
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