we made out on top of his cat.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
Randomize
