TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
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