Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Randomize
