a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
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