Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
He left a cum stain in the shape of a heart on my sheets.
He's like the Bob Ross of love stains.
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Randomize
